Winery Confidential
The Wine Mafia (And How It Makes You Pay More For The Bottle)
How your $100 bottle got made—and who took a cut along the way It started in the hills of Oregon. A winemaker with dirt beneath his nails and a hoodie crusted in dust walked his rows of Pinot Noir at...
The Sweetest Scam in the Wine Industry
When Austrian winemakers added antifreeze to their vintages—and no one noticed until it was too late. Let’s talk about something that sounds fake but isn’t: in the mid-80s, a handful of Austrian wineries decided their wines weren’t sweet enough. So...
“I’m Not Drinking Any F*ing Merlot”
How Hollywood made Pinot Noir a star and turned wine lists upside down It’s 2004. You’re watching Sideways—the indie flick where two middle-aged guys bumble through California wine country, sipping, sulking, and soul-searching. The movie wasn’t exactly Fast & Furious,...
The Founding Father of Wine (in America)
Thomas Jefferson walked so our sommeliers could run Let’s rewind to the 1780s. America was still licking its Revolution wounds, and Thomas Jefferson—yes, that Jefferson—was off in France, technically serving as a diplomat. But while he was supposed to be...
Pinot‑Gate: The $7 Million Syrah in Disguise
How Merlot rode a red bicycle into American glasses and no one tasted the difference The label said Pinot. Your palate nodded yes. Back in the mid‑2000s, America was knee‑deep in the Sideways craze. Pinot Noir became the sip of...
How a guy with a cork‑steamer and laser printer punked the wine elite Let’s set the scene. A hotel ballroom packed with billionaires and critics. Crystal stemware clinking like nervous teeth. A bottle of “1945 Romanée‑Conti” hits the block, and...
And Good Pinot Doesn’t Need a French Passport There was a time when if you said "Pinot Noir," everyone assumed you meant Burgundy. Maybe still do. It’s the standard, the pedestal, the expensive flex. And yeah—there’s magic there. We’re not...
Why the Wine Tastes Better at the Winery
Because context kills scores. You know that feeling when you open the bottle you brought back from that gorgeous little winery and it just... doesn’t hit the same? The wine’s not bad. It’s the same vintage. Same label. But something’s...
Sweat, Lies, and Warm Deliveries
Summer exposes who’s faking it and who’s fighting for it. Let’s talk about what happens when wine gets hot. Not metaphorically. Not some hot category or breakout region. I mean literally, physically, miserably hot—steaming-in-the-back-of-a-FedEx-truck-in-Tulsa-in-July hot. Because here’s the secret no...